She Falls back

to age nine: memory
folds
into dressing room
duels, mirrors 
facing off-
a high noon moment
though closer 
to 11am.
 
she drowned 
in those lakes
spread floor 
to ceiling,
front and back-
 
a lie displayed
in infinite 
extensions of him.
 
each frame 
blurred
as she waded
past tears,
 
trying
to swim deeper-
toward something.
 
anything.
 
just one 
panel of truth
to be free
for a moment
under glass.
 
at peace.
 

Things to Understand About Trans* People and Issues

1. Understand what Trans* is in the first place. 

Trans* or transgender is an umbrella term for anyone who does not fit the gender binary. Some consider intersex individuals and drag queens under this umbrella, some do not. It depends on who you’re talking to.

2. Know that we exist

It is not something we chose. We ARE real. Our gender identities aren’t fantasy, otherwise we would not be here and doctors would not acknowledge us. Trust me.

3. Know how to respect us

Transgender people are still people. We have feelings just like you do. We’re humans with unalienable rights to love, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. All we ask is that you use correct preferred pronouns and don’t treat us like garbage. Seriously, we get enough crap for who we are every day. If you can handle saying hello to that guy you hate, then you can call me a dude and not call me “tranny."

4. GENDER IDENTITY IS NOT A MENTAL ILLNESS

What doctors recognize about trans* people is that we need treatment to become our identity or to cope with the hardships that we have to put up with from other people. My doctor knows being trans* itself isn’t an illness, but I do have to go under the knife to change my sex.

5. Sex and Gender ARE different

Sex is what you are biologically, usually male or female. Gender is what your mind chooses, and it can be a VARIETY of things. Some genders include male, female, third gender, genderfluid, bigender, genderfucked, agender, etc.

6. Using the wrong pronouns is extremely offensive

Most of us understand the occasional slip up, especially if we are long time friends. If you don’t even TRY to use our preferred pronouns, however, you’re 1) a jerk and 2) essentially doing the same as using a racial slur. I don’t care what your personal beliefs are. You would not go to a church chanting satanic rituals with sheep’s blood all over you, would you? No! It is a matter of respect, regardless of what you believe. This is the same. I don’t care if you think I’m still a guy, perhaps I think you’re rude and pretentious, but I will not call you “Mr. Rude and pretentious" every time I talk to you, so please don’t call me by the wrong pronouns. If you have that much of a problem with me, then don’t talk to me. It is that simple.

*Note, if you DO get a pronoun wrong, correct yourself and move on. Most of the time saying sorry repetitively just makes us uber uncomfortable and feel a bit bad. We know it was an accident, relax! 

7. Not all trans* people want to teach all the time

I am personally usually in the mindset of being a teacher, so if someone asks me something I will gladly inform them. That being said, most people aren’t. Even your teachers aren’t teachers all the time. If they were sitting down and having coffee, no one would go up to them and ask what day World War Two started, or what nuclear fission is. The same goes for us. If you have a question it might be better to ask after you know the person’s name or other than when they’re at Starbucks (this has seriously happened to me before).

8. Trans* discrimination IS JUST AS BAD AS OTHER TYPES OF DISCRIMINATION

Whether you’re gay, straight, black, white, fat, skinny, tall, short, or whatever, you have probably faced some kind of discrimination based on something. Of course, some groups have it worse sometimes. African Americans are still subjected to racism in America, and Hispanic people have it particularly bad. Gay folks can’t catch a break in many countries, and in places in Afghanistan women aren’t supposed to attend school! Transgender people are subject to such things. We face a ridiculous amount of discrimination merely for being ourselves. This comes in the form of job discrimination, beatings, denial from stores, sterilization, death, name calling, unlawful arrest, sexual harassment, and other such offensive and awful things. Do not pretend that it does not exist, and do not pretend that people just use birth sex to be “correct." What is correct is to use proper preferred pronouns and not be a dick. Just like you wouldn’t pretend racism doesn’t exist, don’t pretend transphobia doesn’t exist. If you think that it doesn’t, you’re wrong.

9. Don’t out us

Like I said, we get a lot of crap. Sometimes it’s dangerous for us to be outted. I do not want my life in danger because you weren’t able to keep something I trusted you with to yourself.

*Perhaps you want to tell co workers about your trans* kid and you know they’re accepting. Ask your kid first. They may be alright with it, they may not be! This also depends on the person you’re talking to.

10. Gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation are all different

Gender Identity- how the person identifies their gender and who they are.

Gender expression- The ways in which “masculinity" and “femininity" are expressed by each person. Some women are “butch" some men are “feminine." This does not affect a person’s gender identity in any way.

Sexual Orientation- who you love and the relationships you have with them. Not related to gender identity.

This is just the understanding that is important. Maybe your guy friend bakes cakes, but he’s still a guy. Maybe he likes men, but he’s still a guy. The same goes for trans* people. Just identify them as they wish to be identified, otherwise you’re judging them based on unimportant things.

11. Don’t assume things

This is just a rule for bettering yourself as a person with any given situation. We are ALL individuals who have each had unique struggles and accomplishments. Therefore do not assume we all want a sex change, do not all assume we’re transexxuals (Female to male/ male to female), do not assume we are all fetishists, do not assume things! We are all individuals! While I may want to go up to surgery with my transition, I have several friends who stop at taking hormones or even before! It doesn’t make us any less or more trans* or human in any way! 

12. Please do not say….

a) “Have you had the surgery yet?"

Why? Why does it matter? This is extremely personal and you don’t need to know, thanks. Instead “How far have you come in your transition?"

b) “Which bathroom do you use?"

Again, what does it matter? This is just an uncomfortable question to ask ANYONE, so please don’t single us out.

c) “You pass way better than so and so."

If you’re going to compliment me, do it without putting someone else down. Besides, the simple assumption that all men and women and other must look a certain way is sexist and ‪#‎r00d‬

d) “How do you have sex?"

Do I even have to explain this?

e) “I’ll always see you as a man/woman."

That’s great! It’s nice that you assume you have the option of deciding what gender I am! It’s also nice you assume that I actually care!

f) *Only applies if someone posts a before and after pic* “You look great as both" or “You’re hot as both!" Also equally rude “You were a handsome/pretty ________!"

I guess this is just a matter of not mentioning the past. We were never really the opposite gender, we just had to hide who we really were. We feel uncomfortable talking about who we “once were" because we never really WERE them. It’s like wearing a costume for most of your life and suddenly everyone thinks that’s who you are, when in reality it isn’t! We just want to be known as our preferred gender, thanks!

g) “You pass so well!" or “You look just like a real ____!"

This implies that our gender isn’t real. I AM a real man. Who are you to say I’m not? Perhaps you aren’t a real human because you can’t respect others! To tell someone they pass well might seem like a compliment, but it isn’t. It implies that we are being deceptive or that we aren’t what we seem to be.

h) “When did you decide you were a _____?"

Whoah, slow down. I didn’t decide anything. This is something I have always been. When did YOU decide what gender you were? What? You’ve always known? Me too.

i) “How did you know you were a _____?"

This isn’t a particularly hurtful or offensive thing to say. It’s just kinda weird. Ask yourself this question. How did YOU know? The honest answer is that you just kind of do.

j)"But your chromosomes____"

Oh hello, Dr.! You obviously must know SO MUCH about genetics and chromosomes because you’re stating something that everyone learns in grade school! Shush. I work in a lab with genetics and let me tell you, TONS of the stuff you’ve learned about chromosomes and DNA is just false or misrepresented. For instance, we are taught humans have a set amount of chromosomes. However, there are men born with an extra Y chromosome that function perfectly. Women are sometimes born with XY chromosomes and, despite this, grow and function as women with no trace of this except in their chromosomal DNA. Chromosomes may decide my sex, but sometimes they don’t, and they definitely don’t get to decide my gender.

k)"I see you as _____ because you act like _____"

How I act doesn’t have any impact on what I identify as. Go screw yourself if you believe that men and women have to act a certain way.

l)"So, are you really a man/boy or a woman/girl?"

It doesn’t matter. And I am a real whatever I identify as. Sex does not define gender.

m)"tranny" “shemale" “he-she" “boy-girl" “lady man" in ANY FORM

This is the same as calling an African American the N word, a LGB person the F word, or just using a slur in general.

n) “I understand since I’m gay"

While you may have sincere sentiments, this statement undermines the struggles of trans* people. Our experience is profoundly different from that of the gay community.

o) “This or that would make you look more masculine/feminine"

Alright, let me tell YOU something. You should compliment me on what DOES look good. I don’t get to tell you “THIS OR THAT MAKES YOU LOOK FATTER/SKINNIER" so don’t do it to me. Unless I ask you for advice on this, just keep your mouth shut, thanks.

p) “Trans* people are sexy!" or any fetishizing of us

We are not fetishists or sexual objects. Do not treat us like such.

q) “What is your real name?"

This implies that we are lying and or are being something we really are not. My REAL name is the one I choose. Besides, unless you’re my employer it should not matter.

r) “When you were a ____" Or “Before you were a____"

Again, we just dislike being reminded of what we “once were" even though we actually weren’t that.

s) “It’s just a phase" or “you’re just confused"

1) I know who the hell I am, thanks. 2) Obviously I’m not confused because this is what my whole life has been 3) You’re an idiot 4) You’re a jerk 5) shut the hell up

t) “Why not just be a lesbian woman/gay man?"

Gender identity and sexuality have nothing to do with one another except for the fact that our movements are both fighting for equality. Get your facts straight.

u) “Transgendered" “Transgenders"

Just as you would not say “colored person" or “blacks" or “the gays" you wouldn’t do this with trans* people. Just use transgender people or transgender person instead! 

v) “Wow that’s cool! "That’s gross"

Some people do think it’s cool, I guess, but it really isn’t. It’s nothing exciting, nor is it anything disgusting. It’s just a thing. We don’t usually like it to be considered out of the ordinary, because it’s not.

13. We are not

All crazy, all sexual fetishists, all men or women in drag, all going to get surgery, all male or female, all liberal or conservative, all anything! Again, DON’T ASSUME THINGS!

14. Just remember that

Just remember that we’re people, too. We have feelings just as you do. If you don’t understand stuff, just ask! However, do it politely and believe what that person tells you. After all, they are the ones going through it, not you! They know what they’re talking about (hopefully). The general idea is to just be nice and use common sense. If you see someone doing this to a trans* person, tell them what they’re doing wrong! Education is just very important, and these are things people need to know because it’s so poorly talked about.

Aaaaaaand it's a wrap!

    On what started out to be a sunny and humid Sunday, the team of Rainbows Are Real set out for the last and final day of their shoot. No more lights, no more camera and no more action! A few kilometers inside the small city of Dwarka, we found the perfect village to shoot our last few wanted scenes in and by the grace of god, we found the best villagers who not only lent their house freely to us , but supported us in every sense of the meaning. From hot cups of chai, to fully laid down 5 course meal served by the beautiful ladies of the house, they became part of our little family.
     Our youngest member of the team, Sooryaansh not only brought immense talent to the sets with his acting skills, but also with his witty jokes and adorable smile. But like any other professional actor , he gave a mesmerizing performance the minute the camera turned to him. Sanjeev sir , Anusha Celly and the other actors not only gave us exactly what we needed for our shots, but they rightfully captured the feelings of the actual reality and what it is like to be in the shoes of a transgender.
    The shoot was finally wrapped up at 12 o'clock at night , back in Gurgaon with one last shot with our actor, Ankur Singh. After being splashed with colors, been made to change his clothes 30 times over, he never lost the energy and his presence in front of the camera. Kudos to the whole team including the Production Manager Aayush Celly, who tirelessly worked to make sure the shoot went smooth and the script writer, Arushi Pandey, who made sure what was envisioned on the script was brought out just as we had imagined.
    What lies ahead is a long and tough journey of endless hours of editing and bringing together the final film which we all have been eagerly waiting to show.  However these little memories of shooting the uncut film, singing "Manja" loudly in the car, hogging on every particle of food we saw, making every second person our "bro" (courtesy our very own Ritesh Sharma) , awing at Parvez bhai's experiences and pictures of his journey as part of the Roadies crew and finishing 3 packets of chocolate milk (courtesy our bhukkad aka Ankur Singh), will never be forgotten. They've made their own little mark in each of our lives. There might be no more lights, no more camera, and no more action , but the real action has just begun.

Keep following us on facebook , twitter and on our blog to know more about day in a life of Rainbows Are Real !


AAAAAAND IT'S A WRAP! (officially!)

Some more sneak peeks into the shoots of Rainbows Are Real !

Indoor Shoot of Rainbows Are Real

Behind every good cinema lies a strong foundation of a good crew.

  The team of Rainbows Are Real worked tirelessly the past few days during the indoor shoot of the movie. Akash Kukal and Alexandria Stratis were the two actors who were chosen for the respective roles in the movie. Trying new approaches and breaking every conventional rule of cinema, our team headed by Ritesh Sharma, the director of the film, tried the most unconventional ways to bring out the very essence of the film - gay, lesbian, transgender ; people are people.

   Artist, Ritu Barodia also helped us along with our DOP's - Parvez Ahmed and Susanto Chetterji, and production helpers. The shots turned out to be exactly what we had imagined. In our very own director's words . they were " BAVAAAAAL! "

Here are a few glimpses form the shoot - 

   

Formation of Rainbows

      It's been quite a long journey and we believe we haven't been quite updated our followers on the progress of our project. Wait, correction. YOUR project, as well.

      The pre-production stage is in full swing and auditions for the film were highly successful. The auditions for casting were held on the 1st and 2nd June in Mumbai. Hundreds came out to try their hand in making a change.  From funny accents, to funnier dance moves, we found every shade of talent during our mumbai venture. We found few characters which we thought would fit the movie in the best way. On the 8th and 9th June , the Delhi auditions were held. Our team braced ourselves for another 2 days filled with shocking and surprising stars shining out. Little kids to old aunties, we learnt that talent is not lost out when wrinkles appear. It gave us hope, and our team was even more charged up about the future of the movie.
       Next comes the background score of the movie. After hearing out many artists, we came across a band named Delusion, who managed to pick up the same notes as we had imagined it in our heads. They put our dreams into reality with their music. We've managed to put together 3-4 songs and the recording of these will happen with the end of June.
      The shooting for the movie has started with location as Delhi and hot spots here. After a 14 long hour shoot, the team was convinced that we had valuable shots for the scenes. We spoke to a LGBT activist from The Mitr trust, Rudrani Chatterjee. She gave us some valuable insights about the lives that the transgender lead in today's society. She made us rethink the very fundamental norms which are present in today's society - Blue is for boys. Pink is for girls. Says who? She challenges the very concept of only two genders existing and facilities being provided by the Government such as public toilets, jail cells and hospital wards. With her brave and breath taking thoughts and ideas and arguments, she left us thinking more over this issue and the very basic rights which are being denied to the community. We also had the chance to speak to a lawyer, Aditya Pandopadhyay, who gave us an insight to his life story being gay himself and how society do not really welcome them with open arms. Aditya gave us various facts on Sonagazhi, the largest red-light area in Asia.
       With less than 2 months left for the official release of the film, the official website of the movie went live on 15th June. Rainbows Are Real is all set and under process to come out with a bang.
However, your support and the support of many like you is extremely important for us.
To know how to get involved in any manner, check our website and the section called 'get involved' to know how you can help us.

Be a part of change, because change begins with you. Help create a rainbow of happiness.

" You know, gay , lesbian, bisexual , transgender - people are people " - Judith Light.

Whether you are a singer or have a band, we need YOU and YOUR MUSIC for our upcoming film 'Rainbows Are Real' !

Come and audition for the background score in the movie and hit the right notes of change !

The casting for Rainbows Are Real are just around the corner!

Think you've got what it takes ? Hurry and audition for a role in the movie and don't miss your chance for being famous!

All ages from 6 to 35 are welcomed.
HURRY :D

Contact us on - rainbowsarereal@gmail.com

Wake Up India

I  am a 21-year-old transgender — a woman trapped in the body of a man. I am an outcast, abhorred by society. My family disowned me when I told them I wanted to live like a woman. I am pursuing BA from DU through correspondence. To earn a living, I became a sex worker. There was no other option as no one was willing to give me work. But even this job is not easy for I put my life in danger every night when I roam the streets, looking for clients.

There are nearly 10,000 transgenders in Delhi, but we never move in groups because that deters clients from approaching us. That makes me an easy prey to goons, drunk truck drivers and pickpockets. Many a times, I have been brutally raped after being robbed of my money and jewellery. I often come back home — battered and bleeding. If you asked me how many times I have been raped, I will have no answer for I have lost count. I have often been hospitalised with help from NGOs due to the brutal sexual assaults.

Once I was going home at night after attending a friend’s party and took a shortcut through a park close to my home. Five men were hiding behind the bush. They attacked me, pushed me to the ground and pounced on me. The assault was so brutal that it ruptured my breast implant. I started bleeding. A few passersby brought me home. I was bed-ridden for the next few weeks. I had no money. Life became hell those few weeks.

‘Please us, or get raped’
My most cruel assaulters are often the men in uniform. Yes, the cops, who blackmail us to pay hafta so that we can carry on with our job as sex workers. Refusal to please them means lathis, kicks in the mouth, abuses and finally, rape. I have often been raped by cops in parks, and even inside lock-ups. Some often stop me on the road and ask for a quick oral sex. Even when I step out from home for personal work, they insist on sex. Any resistance is met with abuses and torture. At times, I try and run away from the cops. I once even bit their hand in a bid to escape.

I was once looking for clients in front of a park when four cops approached me. I was alone at that time. “If you want to solicit, you will have to please us first (Yahan khada hona chahti hai to pehle hamare sath karna hoga),” one of them said. When I resisted, they dragged me to a secluded spot and took turns at raping me. They raped me for about five hours and made me perform oral sex. They also beat me up, took away my belongings file:///Users/ayushikulsreshtha/Desktop/2301wakeup1.jpgand left me writhing in pain.

I managed to reach home with great difficulty and was taken to a clinic the next morning. I was at the same spot a few months later, when one of those cops recognised me. He said, “So, you are back. Last time it was four of us. This time, it will be eight.”

Horror inside lock-up
I was once held by the police for roaming on the roads late in the night. They arrested me, told me what I do was illegal and threatened to book me under severe sections of the IPC.  I was taken to a lock-up. The moment I stepped in, I heard cops say, “Ab 6-7 din aaram se kat jayenge (Now we can have fun for the next six-seven days).”

I was locked up in a room and raped by many cops that night. I screamed in pain, but they took no pity. “Why are you screaming? Don’t you do this every night,’’ one of them said. I lay there, naked, the whole night. I was released in the morning with the help of some friends who brought a sheet to cover me up.

Where do I go to get my complaint registered? There is no platform for someone like me voice my grievances. If I speak up, I can even get killed. Who will assure me of my safety? I often pray that no one is ever born a transgender.

NGOs confirm rape by cops
Rights activists, who work with transgenders and bisexuals, say such incidents are a common occurrence. “I have come across several such cases of brutal sexual assault on transgenders by the cops. They come and narrate their horror tales to us. A transgender reported being raped by cops for weeks inside a famous Delhi prison. We can’t do much in such cases because the victims themselves back out from identifying the cops, fearing revenge, and we have no proof,” says lawyer and activist Shashi Bhushan of Naaz.

Transgenders are often raped by cops if they refuse to pay them hafta on time or refuse free sex, says Jatin Kumar, project coordinator, DART, another LGBT rights NGO. “Transgenders have no faith in the system. All we can do is get the victims treated,” says Kumar.

Rudrani Chettri, director, Mitr Trust, says she comes across at least one such case of sexual abuse in which policemen are the culprits. “When a transgender is new in sex trade, she doesn’t know the rules. When a cop asks for sex, she tries to run away. That’s when she is chased and put in a PCR van. The rape takes place inside the lock-up, often in the most brutal manner,” Chettri said.

The Delhi Police has promised to make its men more gender-sensitive. Hope they are reading this.
(As told to Shara Ashraf) 

Article taken from Hindustan Times - http://www.hindustantimes.com/India-news/NewDelhi/I-was-raped-by-cops-multiple-times/Article1-998338.aspx

The same fight, worldwide - Transgenders

     We live in a culture of disrespect towards trans people, only compounded by laws on the books that fail to uphold justice equally. But this isn't just about a distant minority, the status of trans people in this country matters not only because we are a marginalized minority – though that is in itself significant – but also because it has broader implications for who we are as a nation. How do we treat each other? To what standard do we hold our government?

Transgender student Alex Sennello wrote about her experience of being a transgender high school student in the US. According to Sennello, schools aren't doing enough to protect students like her – and broad anti-bullying campaigns have oversimplified the unique challenges facing transgender students:

"Only when schools are committed to an overhaul will we stop seeing sexually and gender diverse young people harassed and marginalized. Students like me need be able to walk into classrooms where their gender identities are not assumed; find textbooks that include their history; listen to lessons that recognize their existence; use the bathroom without feeling scared or disingenuous; and have their peers, teachers and administrators understand that the identities and experiences of queer people are natural and valuable." 

The fight is the same worldwide. Join our visual campaign - Rainbows are Real.

( excerpts from www.guardian.co.uk.)